The Traitor

Ever since I was a child, I have been keenly aware of clothes and fashion.  I hate to admit how much it has consumed me.  I have had entire family vacations ruined because I was dressed (what I considered to be) inappropriately. The MTC was depressing for me when the Temple Square sisters arrived and I was in my jungle dresses.  I use to not like going to the gym if my shoes didn't match my tank top. It's been bad.

As a five year old, my first experience at Disneyland was tainted by the fact that my "mean" mom made me wear shorts instead of a dress.  Now that I am an adult I realize that maybe she just didn't pack any dresses (or tutus) for me to wear on vacation.  (This was long before Princesses took over and everyone started wearing dresses and glass slippers to ride the rides and get autographs.) Or maybe she thought I would be more comfortable in shorts.  But I wasn't.  I was extremely uncomfortable.  I can still point out the spot (near the Haunted Mansion) where I saw some teenage girls in their mini skirts and I wanted to cry (and probably did) because they got to wear dresses to Disneyland and I had to wear shorts!  Of all of the wonderful memories I could have created at The Greatest Place on Earth, this is the one that I have. Shorts.

Yes, my two year old wearing heels at Disneyland.

I had to throw in some of our Disneyland pics.

In fifth grade the biggest fad was  "International News".  It seemed like every cool 6th Grader wore a baggy sweatshirt with the bold "International News" print across the front.  And I felt like the only lame 5th Grader who didn't have one of the sweatshirts. I would have given anything for an article of clothing from Varnet, International News, or Gotcha.  But since they hadn't been out long enough to circulate to the local Value Village, I was out of luck.  I was forced to pin my giant New Kids on the Block pins to a regular old jacket. (Yeah, because the no name brand jacket is the lamest thing in that sentence...)

I barely survived Elementary School fashion in time to get to Middle School.  Thankfully my parents were sick of my crying starting to understand me a little more.  When K-Swiss were popular I got the coolest new style.  When the puffy Adidas jacket were all over the halls of Nelsen Middle School, I unwrapped one for Christmas.  I didn't have all of the cool clothes.  But I had at least one article that made me feel like I could breath and cope with every day life.

This is making me sound very vain or shallow or materialistic.  I prefer "keenly aware of fashion". Painfully, keenly aware, with no way to turn it off.  I can't make myself unaware.  I have tried.

But I thought I had it under control.  As the wife of a PA student, I am not wearing 7 for all man kind jeans.  I don't carry a Kate Spade hand bag.  And I am not strutting around in Jimmy Choo shoes. But I am still breathing and enjoying my life. So apparently I have learned how to cope. (Also, most of my friends are not wearing those clothes, so I don't feel like a 5th Grader idolizing the "big kids".) I thought I was immune to that "keen sense" of fashion around me, but it's back.

This time it isn't about shoes, or purses, hairstyles, or anything that even remotely resembles high fashion.

This time it is Blue and Green.

It's everywhere.  And I think I am the only person in Seattle who is not wearing a Russell Wilson jersey today.  Team Sports Wear has never been high on my radar.  Maybe because it didn't use to be very flattering, or particularly fashionable.  Or maybe because I have never been very passionate about any specific team (or team color for that matter, I would probably be more likely to buy a jersey if it were pink).  Or maybe because I have never been the only person not wearing Blue and Green in an entire state.  (Wow, this sounds exactly like me at Disneyland! The only child whose mom wouldn't let them wear a dress!)

This time it isn't about my "mean" mom.  It isn't about the cool kids at school and their fashion. It isn't even about wanting to fit in.

It is about feeling like a traitor in my own state.

I have lived "in" Seattle all my life.  I have rain boots and a rain jacket but no umbrella.  I went to Mariners games in the Kingdome.  I go to the zoo in the pouring rain.  I cancel all of my indoor plans if there is a sun break to be outside.  I camp with blue tarps.  I still like alternative music. I feel compelled to recycle everything. And I think that fish should always be thrown. So why do I feel like I just don't belong??  I feel as unpatriotic as a Beattles shirt on The 4th of July.  I feel like I am letting down my friends, family, and my hometown by not having a giant 12th Man Flag blowing outside in my front yard and proudly wearing an oversize Marshawn Lynch sweatshirt.  I feel like a traitor.

Looks like it is time to go shopping.

I had to get the pic here, since I don't have a 12th Man Flag. :(

Happy Birthday (in July) Blake!!

Happy 5th Birthday Blake!! (2013)

Every now and then I throw one of my kids a pretty cool party.  This time it was Blake's turn.  He wanted a Ninjago Party.

Kai's Fruit Punch

Ninjago cupcakes and balloons

Kai is Blake's favorite. (Frosting is not.)

Ninja Riley

We had a Ninja Training Course where the kids could test out their skills.  They were pretty cute doing somersaults and tricks on the obstacle course.

One of the other brilliant Pinterest ideas, was a Ninja lollipop.  Seriously, what did our Mom's do before Pinterest? 

The Birthday Boy

I think this might be my favorite picture! So cute!!

Viva and Riley posing with the Golden Shurikens.

Russell and Ella in the sun.

No party is complete without a Party Break Down. 

The Boys. (These Boys are all born within a month of each other!)

Ready for the cake.

FYI I'm dressed to go swimming (not running) after the party.

Singing Happy Birthday

Even cute girls can be Ninjas.

Karate Jumps off the wall.

Sadie showing off some of her moves.

Macie loved being a Ninja

Viva, the Ninja Fashionista.

My Favorite Pose.  (It was so hot, Blake was dripping sweat.)

Looking tough

Ready to fight

More awesome jumps.

Another adorable Ninja.

Happy Girls

Blake


Now I feel like a good mom again, for posting one of my kids' birthdays.  I better do Riley's Birthday soon so that I can move on and begin 2014. 

What does Mom DO all day??

Thankfully, I have never had anyone ask me, as a Stay at Home Mom, what I do.  I have seen comments on Facebook and various blogs asking that question. "As a stay at home mom, what do you DO all day??"  The few times that I have seen it from an arrogant, condescending, "I can work a 40 hour week, then come home and do your job on top of that.", snotty attitude.  I have been pretty irate. Thank you all for never being that rude to me (for your own safety).  But even with out the "you just sit and watch soap operas all day" stereotype, I think that some people legitimately don't know what it is we do all day.  And that is because each of us Stay at Home Moms does it differently.  I considered sharing my normal "work" day with all of you.  But realized that writing out "continually doing everything I can to teach, love, support, and inspire 3 children without going insane, or crying in a closet." doesn't really do it justice.  (Maybe someday I will write that post.)

For now, I would like to share with you what my son, Blake, thinks I do all day.

This morning, as we were gathered (in a reverent, angelic manner) to have family prayer (read: someone inevitably crying, someone sneaking bites of cereal with one eye open, and me trying to remember to brush someone's hair before the bus comes) it was Blake's turn to pray.  He sweetly gave thanks for our family and then proceeded to ask Heavenly Father for the blessings we need today:

"Please bless Daddy to have a good day at school...

"Please bless me and Riley to have a good day at school...

"Please bless Macie to have a good day at Preschool...

"Please bless Mommy to....

This is where I stopped thinking about where I saw the brush last and listened intently to see what Blake thought I would be doing today.  It was clear that the entire rest of the family would be at school. So what is it that my 5 year old son thinks I do all day??

"...uh... to do good in her class at the gym..."

So there you have it.  While my husband needs blessings to study hard and get through his final year of PA school, and Riley and Blake to enjoy their schooling, and Macie to be have fun at Miss Ashlee's (how hard can it be?), I am blessed to kick some butt in my spin class at the gym. :)

And that is just what I did.

But here are a few pics for the snotty attitudes ;)

Teaching Blake to make Pie Crust

Raising them to get recognized at school for outstanding behavior.

Throwing awesome Birthday Parties (that I forgot to Blog about)

Teaching them to ride a bike.

Ok, ok, I guess I do a little bit more than work out at the gym :)

Best Day Ever!!!!! (besides my Wedding Day, oh, and the birth of each of my children...)

Maybe I should go back and explain how this all came to be. 

Last year when I decided on my Word for 2013 and blogged about it here I chose the word Dream.  I wanted to focus on living my dreams, and helping my children live their dreams as well.  It was important for me to start living them now, and not wait until we are out of school, out of the basement, or out of debt to live. I am very happy to report that my children have had some fun adventures this year (that maybe I will get around to blogging) including taking Gymnastics and beginning Violin lessons.  Both of these are things that my kids have wanted to do, and are things that we probably can't afford.  But in the spirit of chasing dreams, we have made sacrifices so that our kids could believe in the power of Dreaming Big.

As for myself, I really hadn't done much to further my own dreams.  I think reality hit me harder than I expected in 2013.  It turned out to be one of my most difficult, and most trying years.  I often felt like I was in survival mode only.  And that keeping my head above water was going to be my greatest accomplishment.  (I did accomplish one dream; of running a Half Marathon... that I don't think I ever blogged about... but it was a pretty huge accomplishment!) Other than my run, I think I somehow set myself and my dreams aside to get us through this year.

Fortunately for me, JT did not set aside my dreams.

I have always wanted to fly a plane.  I remember the first time I flew in a small plane.  My family was at the Fair in Monroe where there was a tiny plane giving short rides around the fair grounds and surrounding area.  If I remember right, my sister and I thought that sounded like fun, but assumed we couldn't do it because it cost extra.  To our surprise, my Dad encouraged us to take the flight. (We were use to a very a frugal family, so spending extra at the fair was a pretty big deal.)  Thank you, Dad, for encouraging your girls to do something that seemed crazy (like risking our lives in a tiny airplane at a fair). It changed my life.   I loved it.  I couldn't believe how much I loved it.  And I have loved every flight after that.

If you know me, I get almost as excited for the plane flight as I do for the vacation. I love seeing planes flying overhead.  I like to imagine who is on the plane, where they are going, and how lucky they are to be going on an adventure! (I hate it when I realize that someone on the plane may be going somewhere they don't want to go, or leaving people they love.  Usually I just assume everyone is headed somewhere tropical with the people they love.) Basically, I love everything about flying.

As a young adult I met a guy who was getting his Pilot's license and I thought it was the coolest thing ever. And then as an EFY counselor I remember one of the speakers talking about his Dream List.  Where he wrote all of his craziest, wildest dreams.  And how he lived each of them.

I decided then, that I would get my Pilot's license by the time I was 30.  Well, 30 came and went, and I was no where near getting my license.  I was pretty much still day dreaming whenever a plane flew over head.

But last month was my Birthday.  JT told me he had a surprise scheduled for the week after my Birthday.  On my actual birthday, he gave me a gift that was not what I expected.  I was actually disappointed ( I really hate admitting this). The gift felt somewhat thoughtless (probably because I am use to him giving very thoughtful gifts).  I got upset and accused him of not thinking about me. I even accused him of planning this surprise to be something he wanted to do, not me.  After all, I didn't ask to do something for my birthday, I asked to receive something!  My friends tried to insist that he had something up his sleeve, but I didn't believe them, and went to him crying that night. Keep in mind, this is minutes before my temperature spiked and I began throwing up. So I blame some of my obnoxiousness on the fact that I was getting sick and had no idea. The rest of it was me just being a brat, I know. When I cried to JT about how I felt like he wasn't thinking about me, and the gift was about him, he was pretty hurt.  He told me how he had thought a lot about the gift, and all he wanted was to help me live my dreams.

I was humbled.

And immediately I knew what I would be doing. FLYING.

We haven't talked about that particular dream in years, but he had remembered. (Yes, I felt dumb.  Yes, all of my friends were right.  Yes, I constantly underestimate the amazingness of the man I married.)

So, after rescheduling 4 times because of weather.  On January 3, 2014 I flew an airplane.

I had no idea what to expect for the flying lesson.  I was nervous that they would have me do math.  Especially when I saw this picture in a book on the coffee table of the waiting room at the flight school.

This has been one of the things holding me back: Math.

But the pilot came and got us and walked us straight out to the runway.  And there sat the little two seater Cessna that we would be flying. He showed me how to check the plane for safety and the next thing I know, I was inside the plane learning about the instruments. (Luckily there wasn't a quiz, because I was too excited to remember half of it!)

Pretty impressive that my scarf matched my plane :)

I was shocked when Grant (the instructor) asked me if I wanted to take off. Like me, personally, lift the plane off!!  But I had already decided that I would say Yes to whatever he asked.  The next thing I knew I was pushing in the throttle and pulling up the Yoke and we were lifting off the ground.  And that is when it happened.  The feeling of pure freedom rushed over me.  I felt the plane lift off the runway and into the air and I was released from all of the cares of the world.  It was just me and the plane (and the instructor, Grant, of course) and the air beneath us.

I have imagined a million times how wonderful it would feel to soar above the clouds but nothing compared to the reality.  I have never felt so free.  Nothing (but some laws of gravity and physics) connected me to the earth.  I was absolutely free.  No distractions, no stop signs, no boundaries, no limits.  

I was definitely timid at first as I got use to the yoke and the controls under my feet.  But Grant reassured me how safe we actually were. (The scientists who invent and build planes are pretty amazing.) Soon I was comfortable enough to take the yoke and experience the sky for myself.  We flew all around the greater Seattle area and the Puget Sound.  

Out the window, overlooking UW

One of my favorite moments was a deep 360 degree turn, and feeling the force of 2G.  I know I am not a Blue Angel or anything, but even 2G was pretty awesome.  At another point in the flight, he made the plane stall.  I felt like all time stopped.  Everything sat hovering over the Puget Sound, and then all at once the nose began to dive down and to the right, my stomach lurched, and my smile brimmed.  To go from standing still, to diving and then regaining the controls and altitude was one of the most exciting moments.

Sorry, its hard to be a pilot and a photographer.

I took a video, but I can't figure out how to get it on blogger:( so this will have to do.

After gliding past the Seattle shoreline, it was time to land the plane.  Which was also pretty cool, to line it up, and try to set it down smoothly.  (Grant did 95% of the work on the landing, but he let me believe I did more.)


When my feet were back on the ground it was almost a let down.  I was literally out of the clouds, and back down to earth.  I can't believe how much I loved having nothing under me except air and wind. I don't feel like I can adequately explain how incredible it felt!  I don't know what it is about the ground that seems to be holding me back, but there is something about the sky that seems to let me go.  The sense of freedom and being unbound was one of the best feelings of my life.  I am probably sounding really repetitive, because I don't know any more words for amazing. Fascinating, marvelous, incredible, thrilling, spectacular, stunning. It was everything.

It was a dream come true.

Even though it wasn't in 2013 I am counting it for living my dream.  It was the best possible start to a new year. I don't know when I will be able to continue with more lessons, and be able to get my license.  But for now I am content knowing that I am one step closer to one more dream.

The other planes, I have yet to fly.

Feelin' Lucky

I am not sure if I will even be able to post this.  As I have been thinking about writing it- it is getting too mushy and sappy for me to even stomach it, let alone post it!  But here goes...

Lately I have been feeling lucky.  Not the "let's go to Vegas and put it all on 7" lucky.  Or the kind of "feeling lucky" that JT feels after he has done the dishes and vacumed the house.  This is a different kind of lucky.

A few years ago I read the book The Power by Rhonda Byrne. (A must read.) It was a life changing book.  (Which is what lead me to The Magic, which may have been an even more life changing book!  Crazy how many times my life has changed in the last few years... pretty soon you may not even be able to recognize me!) The main concept of the book is how the law of attraction works.  Feeling love for things will bring those things to you. This is a hard thing to master when you have struggles, because you are even suppose to love those struggles. (crazy)

Recently I had the chance to teach Riley about this "power".  We were bowling with some cousins and Riley was getting frustrated that she was bowling poorly and others were doing better than her.  (Man, she is the mini-me!) I felt so sad as I watched her missing out on the fun with her family because she was too consumed by her own sadness.  (I remember doing this exact same thing as a child.  I remember my parents being frustrated that I wouldn't "just be happy" and that I was missing out.  I remember feeling even more frustrated that for some reason I couldn't "just be happy" which made me even more miserable!)  My heart broke as I watched her.  I knew she would go home and regret missing out on the fun, but I knew that she had no idea how to stop being disappointed.  We had a minute to go to the bathroom (in a bowling alley-- soooooo grosse!) where I decided to take a risk and try to help.

In the bathroom I told her that I knew the trick for her to be able to bowl better and start having fun.  I am sure she thought that I was going to teach her some new technique (or how to cheat) but instead I told her about The Power.  I promised Riley if she would be happy for her cousins and siblings when they bowled well, that she would start to bowl better also.  I told her she would have to cheer for them, and give them High-Fives whenever they took a turn.  I promised that by being happy for other's good fortune it would come to her as well.  Then I prayed like crazy that the law of attraction was real and would work! I was pretty nervous, since I had made a promise.  But I really believe in the power of love and that in giving love you will receive it. (Mostly because I have applied it and been benefited by it so much in my own life.)

We headed back down to our lane where her cousins bowled.  I reminded her to High Five and cheer, which she did somewhat begrudgingly, when they did well.  Finally it was her turn, and she pushed the ball down the ramp (thank goodness for ramps and bumpers!) and guess what happened next?  The first Strike of the night!!  Riley ran and buried her head in my lap like she does when she is embarrassed and wanting to hide her giant smile.  She was amazed.  I was relieved.  She continued to energetically cheer for her cousin and for Macie and give High Fives after every turn, and she continued to bowl well.  There are probably a ton of explanations for this.  Most likely that being selfless makes you feel good, and when you feel good you do good.  And when you are genuinely happy for others, you feel happier for yourself.  This worked even when she guttered the ball (amazing to still be able to gutter ball with bumpers) she was still able to be happy.

Riley bowling with cousins!

Macie

I seriously couldn't get a good shot of Blake.

I am not just feeling lucky that Riley bowled so well.  Or that I didn't have a promise backfire on me.  I am feeling lucky because I have really seen this law of attraction working in my own life lately.

I noticed it at the beginning of summer, when I saw a friend post on facebook about how she wanted her children to learn to do more service this summer.  She wasn't just passively thinking about it either.  She had already arranged to take her kids to a nursing home to cheer up the elderly.  She also had plans for a fun, and academic summer as well.  I was in awe of her motivation.  Summer wasn't just a time for her to read a book while her kids fought over the T.V.  It was a time to learn, serve, and play.  As soon as I was done being impressed by her, I began to be jealous that I am not her!  Why am I not that cool? And then I remembered the Power.  It's OK that I am not her, because I am friends with her!  How lucky am I to be friends with an amazing woman??  I must be doing something right to attract a person like that into my life.  The happier I am for her, and grateful for her example, the more I may become like her.

Once I noticed this it became very easy for me to recognize all of the beautiful, amazing women that I am surrounded by!  I have a friend whose life has been turned upside down the last few years.  By the loss of a still born baby, the change of faith in her family, the change of direction in many ways, but through it all she has been an example of unconditional love.  She has reminded me how to love everything about someone, how to survive grief, how to stay calm and carry on.  She loves and serves and teaches everyone around her.  And she is my friend!  I don't have to be her, (although there are moments that I have wanted to) but I can be blessed that I am around her.

I have another friend who seems to always have the right thing to say.  Our talks started at the gym, of all places, while we were stretching after work outs.  There have been many tears shed on those nasty gym mats as we have had a chance to share some of our most difficult trials.  She is a beautiful, strong woman and it would be so easy to be jealous of her strength and her intelligence, but instead I just feel lucky to have her insights and her advice.

Do you see where I am going with this?  I feel like I am surrounded.  I even have a friend (who has been mistaken a few times for my sister, which is absolutely a compliment!) that loves to think the same ridiculous thoughts as me.  We have fun laughing at the same things, while bonding over very similar struggles.  Our lives have flowed on a parellel line for so long that I feel like we understand each other's paths as well as our own.  She is well loved, and extremely talented.  She is smart in many ways that I am not.  But I don't feel jealousy, I just feel love.

I could even go back 20 years to the beginning of one of my most meaningful friendships of all.  A friend that I could not have lived without during high school and my young adult years.  A friend who is extremely talented and the type that most of us are jealous of!  She has always been able to ground me, while reading my mind, and cracking me up.  While reading The Magic recently, one chapter challenged me to think of someone who had a huge impact on my life and to Thank them in my mind throughout the day.  Of course she was the first person who came to my mind.  She has always had a powerful and positive affect on me, and I have always felt blessed to call her my best friend.

I could go on and on and on.  The close friend that I visit teach that serves me way more than I could serve her!  Whose talents and creativity are boundless!  Every time I am in her home I feel total peace, which is a priceless gift to share with a friend.  (Did you see what I did with that play on words? Priceless?  Ok, that is the only hint I am giving!)  Or another friend who puts her children and family first.  Filling her backyard with amazing toys, a beautiful garden, and tons of opportunities for adventures.  She does this because she loves her children.  Not for anyone else to see, or for any other purpose than to be a wonderful mom.  She does all of this while working part time to take care of women in labor.  She can be exhausted from her hard work, and still have a fun day planned for her family.  I love being inspired whenever I am around her.  And another friend who seems to be the most talented person I have ever met.  I can't think of talent or virtue that she doesn't possess.  She juggles her church service, her family, her friends, her musical pursuits, her dreams, her creativity, her faith, and her many other talents before I even get out of bed.  If she wasn't so absolutely lovable I am sure all women would be insanely jealous of her.  But I am just deeply grateful that someone so amazing would also love me.  Her goodness seems to rub off on everyone around her, which makes it easy to be grateful for her and to feel lucky to have her as a friend.

So you see why I can hardly post this?

It is so sappy, so mushy, so gushy it is almost nauseating   And yet, I have a million more girl friends I want to mention!  (Did you notice how I slipped in how I have a million more friends? So that you would all be jealous of my popularity and how many friends I have?  Don't be jealous, be happy for me  and you will be popular too! ((That's the law of attraction!)) "Just not quite as pop-u-lar as meeeeeeeee!" If you don't know what song that is from, we are not friends.)

I have really struggled to post this because I hate for anyone to feel left out.  I would be devastated if one of my close friends was not mentioned and feels undervalued.  That is not the case at all.  And I sincerely hope that no one feels like that.  I just have too many friends. (just kidding) So I am posting this (at the risk of unintentionally hurting someone) because I know how lucky we all are.  And how blessed we all are to have each other.  Uh oh, time to go, it is getting really mushy and it is almost "that time of the month" so some crazy sappy stuff may start coming out of my mouth!

Having A Christ Centered Holiday

Last month I was asked to give a quick little talk at a Thanksgiving Dinner with the topic of having a Christ Centered Holiday.  I thought I would share that talk here for those of you that are heartbroken to have missed it.... 

When I was a child my Mom’s best friend, our next door neighbor was Donna Semonelli.  Donna is Jewish.  And for Christmas one year she thought it would be appropriate to give my mother the Barbara Streissand Christmas Album (Because she liked the irony of a Jewish friend giving her Christian friend a record of a Jewish singer singing Christmas music.)  That album became our symbol of the beginning of Christmas.  Every year, as soon as my mom played that record, and we heard Barbara’s fast paced version of Jingle Bells we knew it was time for Christmas.

My children and I have a similar tradition; only their favorite song is Josh Groban’s Little Drummer Boy.  It has become a family favorite.  And every time we sing it, I think about the words. (Don’t worry, I will not sing them) 

“Come they told me, pa rum pa pum pum, A new born king to see, Our finest gifts we bring, To lay before the King, So to Honor Him, When we come.”

The next verse continues as this young drummer boy explains his gift:
“Little Baby, I am a poor boy too, I have no gift to bring, That’s fit to give our King, Shall I play for you, On my drum?”

According to the song, Mary agreed and he played his drum as a gift for the King of Kings.  And it is reiterated that He is playing to Honor the Baby.  And then he even says “I played my best for him”.

I think my kids love all of the “pa rum pa pum pums” in the song, but I love that little part.  That the poor boy played his best to Honor the Baby Jesus.

Tonight, I have the opportunity to speak about having a Christ Centered Holiday.  In the First Presidency Christmas Devotional in 2011 President Uchtdorf  talks about this Spirit of Christmas.  He said   

“It is usually something small—we read a verse of scripture, we hear a sacred carol and really listen to its words, or we witness a sincere expression of love. In one way or another, the Spirit touches our hearts, and we see that Christmas, in its essence, is much more sturdy and enduring than the many minor things of life [that] we too often use to adorn it.

“We realize in these precious moments what we feel and know in our heart—that Christmas is about the Christ.”

I love that simple reminder, that we may feel in a song, in a verse, in a Family Home Evening that remind us that Christmas is about Christ.  But how do we continue to remember that throughout the Holiday season?  After all, Black Friday now starts on Thursday!  We have to get out there and start buying our gifts, and climbing our roofs to string the lights, and hunting and searching for the perfect Noble Fir to display in our living room.  It seems so easy to forget those beautiful words of a hymn, or verse about Christ when there are so many other distractions.  Even though some of those distractions are good as well.  (I want to make sure that JT knows he is not off the hook for putting up Christmas lights this year.)

But I think there is a lesson for me in the song my kids love, and also from the story of Christ’s birth. 

President Uchtdorf said that we, “like the Wise Men of old, should seek the Christ and lay before Him the most precious of gifts: a broken heart and a contrite spirit. We should offer Him our love.”

There is nothing I can buy for sale on Black Friday, to offer the Savior.  The only thing I have to offer Him is my heart, and my love.  We each have our own ways of offering this gift.  The Wise Men brought expensive gifts as a symbol and acknowledgement of His Royalty.  The little (and probably fictitious) drummer boy brought his talents.  A few years ago when our family was struggling financially, our friends secretly provided Christmas gifts for our family.  That tender offering was sacred in our home, and was an offering to Christ as much as it was to my children.  Because when we serve our fellow men we are only in the service of our God.  And when we bring tender, heart felt gifts to those in need, we are laying them at His feet as well.  As a missionary, my companion and I sang Christmas Carols at the homes of our investigators.  In a poverty stricken, third world country, I would have loved to have given the material gifts that they so desperately needed.  But the offering I had was simply the beautiful message of a Savior.

There are literally hundreds or thousands of ways that we can be like this Little Drummer Boy and give our best to the Savior this Holiday Season.  I love that the Holiday Season begins with Thanksgiving.  What better way to prepare to celebrate the Birth of the Savior than by giving Thanks? We can start right there, and carry that spirit of Gratitude for the rest of the season. 

As a parent, I feel like one of the ways I can “offer Him my heart and my love” (like President Uchtdorf suggested) is to teach my children.  After all, as the mother in the home, I am probably the biggest contributor to the Spirit in our home.  If I am frazzled by gift wrapping, and turkey, and holiday baking - that may become the center of our holiday.  And I, like the Grinch who tried to steal Christmas may teach them to misunderstand the meaning and purpose of Christmas.  I love when the Grinch hears the Who’s singing on Christmas morning.

And the Grinch, with his Grinch-feet ice-cold in the snow,
Stood puzzling and puzzling: "How could it be so?
It came without ribbons! It came without tags!
"It came without packages, boxes or bags!"
And he puzzled three hours, `till his puzzler was sore.
Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn't before!
"Maybe Christmas," he thought, "doesn't come from a store.
"Maybe Christmas...perhaps...means a little bit more!"

I have tried, over the past few years, to combat some of that materialism by adding in some traditions that help us to focus a little more on the Savior every day and to teach my kids that Christmas does mean more.  The first couple years, I made one of those fun “countdown chains” that the kids could pull off one link each night.  And the link would have a scripture about Christ that we could read together as a family before bed.  I was amazed at how much a simple little scripture helped me to stay focused on the Savior.

Last year I decided I really wanted an advent calendar.  I always loved them growing up, especially the ones with candy behind the little doors!  And while I was scouring Pinterest and Costco for “the perfect advent calendar”, I realized I wanted it to be more than just a chocolate, I wanted it to some how countdown to the Birth of the Savior.  And since pinterest and Costco didn’t have “the perfect count down to the birth of the Savior advent calendar” I had to make my own. (I am not some super crafter or anything, so please don’t get any ideas to call me to Relief Society Enrichment or anything).  And every day, as we placed an ornament on the tree – with a scripture and symbol of Christ, we studied about the birth, life, and teachings of Christ.

This is just one simple way, that my little family has tried to have a Christ centered holiday.  I hope to continue to add more traditions that enable us to offer our best gifts this year. 

I’d like to suggest one last way that we can have a Christ centered holiday and offer a gift to the Savior.  President Uchtdorf suggested that this gift be a “broken and contrite heart”.  This is the offering that Christ commanded the Nephites to offer when He came to the promised land. This was to be there sacrifice.  We all have something we can sacrifice. A bad habit, a sin, even a sin of omission, or something that we have been reluctant to do for whatever reason.  What will your offering be?

 This Christmas, we can focus on giving the purest, and best offering of a pure, contrite, broken, and willing heart.  There may not be a better gift to give to the Christ Child than a willingness to repent and come closer unto Him.  After all, it is a season celebrating Birth- a new beginning.

I love this season.  I love the smell of trees, I love the shopping, I love the Christmas carols and Christmas decorations, I love the giving, and baking, and every other aspect of this season.  But above all of that, I love the Savior.  I am deeply grateful to be a member of His Church and to feel such a closeness to Him at this time.  I hope that our hearts grow like the Grinch’s heart, as we realize that Christmas means a little bit more this year.  And that we can all find an offering to give that brings us closer to Him and centers our lives around Him.

Here is a link to the post I did last year that shows the tree Felt Advent Tree that I made with the Scriptures.  

Merry Christmas!