Saturday, October 30, 2010


Family Night- a few weeks ago.

ME: Service is when we do something nice for someone without expecting anything in return.


RILEY: If I help you make your bed? Is that service?

ME: Yeah Riley! That's it! What else is Service?

RILEY: Helping Mommy?

ME: Yep, Helping Mommy clean the bathrooms is service.
(This is where I need to tell that I have discovered that my children LOVE to clean TOILETS! I give them the scrubber wand - with the disposable soapy thing at the end - and they can be entertained for hours!!)

ME: What else?

RILEY: If Blake helps wipe my bum when I go potty, is that service?

Yep, you read that right.

ME: (not wanting to stifle any desire to serve) Uh, yeah, I guess that IS service...

SO, Primary President, do you have a lot of stickers for Blake's "Acts of LOVE", we have had a lot of SERVICE around our house lately...

Sunday, October 24, 2010

loving Riley Kate

It was Riley's Birthday last month... don't worry, pics of the cup cakes and butterflies are still to come. I have been thinking so much about when she was born and then we had a conversation the other day that I knew I needed to write down.

On my mission I had a few reoccurring dreams. One was a Nightmare, and the other was wonderful. In the Wonderful Dream, I would be playing with this little girl. She was about 8 I would guess. She looked like my oldest niece but with dark hair. I really loved this little girl. There were always some younger kids around her, but I only specifically remember talking with her. Every time I was about to wake up I would tell this little girl that it was time for me to go. She would start to cry and hold me. I would be so confused Why this little girl was so upset with me leaving her? I would ask what is wrong and she would say "We just MISS you SO MUCH" Right then I would look at the other little children that were near her and realize that I was their mom! The thought would suddenly occur to me that we had known each other for a very long time. Right when I would realize it, I would wake up. And I would miss her deeply.

Since I am very prone to Nightmares, I have tried to not pay attention to my dreams. And I usually find myself saying "It was JUST a dream, it was JUST a dream" In this case I knew it was more and looked forward to the next time that I would have that dream. (I think it happened 3 times total on my mission)

I guess I always knew that my oldest would be this little girl.

When I had the ultrasound that told me that Riley was a girl, I cried. I was terrified that she would turn out Just Like ME! I worried that she would face my trials, and make my same choices. I worried at how hard I knew her life might be. The only reassurance that I found was in that dream.

Finally, on September 18 (8 days late) She was born. As I was pushing (not very effectively due to the VERY HEAVY epidural I had with her, making it impossible to know if I was even pushing at all) the doctor told me she could feel her hair! I was so shocked (since Nelson's don't tend to have babies with much hair) and so excited. I told JT that if she was a brunette we could name her Riley. (since it seemed like a Brunette name to me, and would fit the girl in the dream) When they finally handed her to me (after many attempts by the nurse who was thwarted by an obscene amount of Maconium) I felt like I recognized her. I felt overwhelmed with love. And Comforted that she was no longer missing me.

Well, last week, as were driving in the car Riley began to ask me about when I got married. She asked if She was IN my TUMMY when we got married. Of course, I told her she was NOT. (thank goodness,because the Temple frowns on that) She asked if Blake or Macie was in my tummy. I said no, and explained that she was with Heavenly Father. She got very serious, even sad, and told me. "Yeah, I was crying." I said "no, Riley, you were with Heavenly Father, you were very happy" She then told me more sternly "No, Mommy, I WAS CRYING. I MISSED you SO MUCH. And then Blake started to cry and I hugged him. And then Macie started to cry, so I hugged her too."

I could feel the Spirit so strong. I even started to tear up driving my car! It was so tender to hear her sweet voice, it was almost like hearing it in my mission dream again. There are a lot of things I don't know about this life, the life before, and the next life to come-- but one thing that I KNOW is that the Family is EVERYTHING in all three. I am not sure how it works. I am just grateful for the tiny glimpses into Heaven that we are given.

Riley is so special to me.

Growing up I realized how my mom has a different relationship with each of her children. Now that I have a third I see that this is unavoidable (even necessary) because each child is so different. It doesn't mean that I love Blake or Macie any less. Not at all. It just means that we will have unique experiences with each of our children.

Riley is my sweetest little friend and shadow. I love the fun we have to together. I love her laugh. And her desire to see others laugh. I love her tender heart that is always aware of her younger siblings. I love her excitement and passion for life. I love her little brain that seems to always be going and going. And how much she loves learning. I love her fashion sense! I love her pretty blue eyes. I love that she sneaks in my bed at night. Especially the nights that JT is not there. I love that she wants me to sing Mary's Lullaby every night before she goes to bed. I love that she loves to bake with me and wants to go jogging with me. I love how she says her name "Wiyey Kate". I love how she jumps into my arms beaming when she has done something right. I love that she can pick up Giant Beetles without screaming. I love that she wants to wear my make up.

I love that she is all mine.

Thursday, October 21, 2010

Score ONE for JT

Ever since we were cheesy Newly Weds (OK, sometimes we still are cheesy) JT and I have played a little game. You know the game. You played it in High School with your first Boyfriend when your mom would tell you it was time to get off the phone.

You would say "oh, I gotta go."
And He would say "Oh, ok..."
Then you would say "bye"
And He would say "bye"
Then you would WAIT to see if the other HUNG UP THE PHONE! When you could still hear him breathing you would say "You hang up first!" and He would say "No, YOU hang up first!"

And somehow we understand that the desire to not be the One to "Hang Up First" indicates Affection. We must like them MORE if we won't hang up first.

Well, JT and I have grown up-- but some things never change...

Me: "I love you, Babe"
JT: "I know, But I love YOU MORE"
Me: "No, You couldn't possibly love me more. I love YOU more"
JT: "No, I love YOU more."

This could go on for awhile.

Sometimes we try to make our point by throwing in what we consider proof of our "more" love. Like when I say - "I let you have the covers last night" or he says "but I love you more, because I bought the ice cream you like today"
(I should interject that we are never arguing about this. It is NOT a leverage thing, but a silly lovey-dovey-your-mushiness-is-nauseating- kind of game.)


He was telling me one groggy afternoon when he woke up from after working a lot of long nights about the experience he had...

He began with a few nights before when he got home from work in the middle of the night. He used the last of the toilet paper. He had been awake for most of 24 hours and was very tired. Knowing that I often wake up in my sleep to use the bathroom and how disappointed I would be to find the empty roll- he went to refill it. Unfortunately we were out of T.P. in the master bath. SO he went to the kids' bathroom, which was also out. SO he went downstairs and looked under the sink-- which was also out! So he took the roll off of the downstairs bathroom and brought it upstairs for me-- so that I would have it ready when I woke up...

But before he could finish the story, I had a flashback of that morning:
I was running late to get to my class at the gym. JT had just come home and I was just leaving. He looked tired. I ran in- to finish getting ready-- and used the last of the T.P.... No biggie, I will change it when I get home from the gym (I was not aware at this time, the good deed he had done for me a few nights earlier)...apparently, some time between my leaving the house and that afternoon-- JT needed the restroom...

I think you can see where this was going.
JT wins.

That is just the kind of person he is. The kind of guy who hunts down toilet paper so that I am not stranded in the bathroom in the middle of the night. (I am the girl who thinks T.P. just magically appears!) He is the kind of guy who really tries to live by the Golden Rule of Treat Others How You Want to Be Treated. He is the kind of guy who thinks of little things like surprising me with my favorite candy,(I am the girl who can't remember anyone's favorite candy) or cleaning the shower because he knows I can't stand it, or letting me sleep in, or taking a cold shower so I can have all the warm water, or EVERY time we get into bed asking if I need anything else (like a glass of water) and then hopping out of bed to go get it. (might I mention, that if he wasn't so sweet to get me water before I go to bed- I might not have to pee in the middle of the night!)

The bottom line is- JT WINS. Sometimes I really do just think about myself. He is so aware of my needs- and I am so aware of MY needs-- that I am not sure who is aware of HIS needs! lol.

SO while JT WINS for replacing the toilet paper, and then me leaving it bone dry for him without even a little scrap clinging to the roll ---